if you like lots of fighting
if you like people liable to jump from
the tops of high places
their options like eyelids, unbatted
surviving, unflappable, by means of –
[cut away]
why, i’d say this just might be for you
if you like falcons* flying
and jeremy irons
if you value high orders of god corporate
cluelessness, science divine
in its improbability
plots lines that spew from computer screens
proving the existence of game theory
really, this could be for you
if you like your hawks* flying
if you like your films stylish
if you like your macguffins quite rounded
your heroes brought low
but still bearded, gruff, cut from a mould
if you like all the conflicts to stay unresolved
’til the sequel that’s stealing the plot
well, what ho! this’ll do
if turkeys* are flying, if you stand to decry
but you find yourself writing reviews
with a semblance of rhyme
in the hope your denial won’t show
and that no one will find out you didn’t despise it
console yourself knowing the trailer with matt damon
blank-faced and fighting off dragons in china
probably gave you perspective (false positive)
rose-tinting all you’d expect to find dire
* despite prolonged opportunity, this viewer failed properly to distinguish
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